Dating an exceptionally pretty lady? Woe unto you!

I have penned before that all ladies are difficult to tame (a position I don’t intend to modify in the near future), but exceptionally pretty women are a special challenge. While lightheartedly admitting to the temporary hypothesis that all ladies are beautiful in their own way, this post is about the kind of women that society considers exceptionally attractive.

I’m referring to the pageant chicks in their prime (considering the fact that beauty is short-lived), pursued and courted by multi-millionaires and property tycoons, feared by ordinary nerds and social jerks.

On the other end are easily replaceable cogs in an economic behemoth, commanding a low 5-digit net worth and no status to speak of. Still in the initial blush of youth, marred by brash and unrealistic cocky ambitions of what they can achieve, impervious to feedback and advice, this is the characteristic mismatch that comes to mind when I talk of dating a lady way out of your league.

An entire panoply of game behavior and vibe goes into meeting and seducing such ladies, a reason why most of them die single or end up single mothers. But why do men dread these good-looking ladies?

Fear- and sometimes experience- cultivates an exquisite sense of one’s sexual rank, eliciting an avoidance mentality that preempts rejection by sultry ladies thought to be out of one’s league. However, a few warriors of the whiskered wound have beaten out of their league and lived to demystify the entire story. It is all summed up by the feeling that they will possibly be turned down.

However, there is a rare breed of guys, men with vibe and delusional confidence, who will often bang the kind of women considered by the general public to be out of their league. If they are not sugar daddies, then I’m sorry they fall victim to quote:

‘Youth is wasted on young’ . The sweet idiocy of romanticism. It makes a fool out of everyone involved, but no man is complete without having been wrung through it.

Dating far above your social strata will furnish you with a glimpse of the life that exists at a completely different stratum of society. You will be surprised at her infinite admittance to favors and accouterments of her elevated station. Socializing with people who own superfluous yachts, overseas luxury properties, infrequently used personal jets, you will have nothing to offer in these types of trades. While she takes first-class flights, you struggle for a seat next to the driver in a luxury bus. It turns out to be a clandestine nature of a relationship though you may not accept it.

Sometimes you get stupidly cocky and naively in love as to expect that she will ditch her 9-digit-worth-benefactor for you just because you profess love and sweat in bed, on the couch or on whatever surface that the two of you prefer.

Regardless of the fact that you will possibly snatch a few fleeting memories with the hottie, the attempt to turn those sublime moments into a somewhat permanent and self-replenishing feature in a relationship creates conflict and drama, which is exhilarating at first but must turn perplexing, bitter, harrowing and finally exhausting.

True love has a constant undercurrent of mild euphoria as well as a sense of peace in one another’s presence. Nor does it diminish with time. This definition alone tells you that true love is not common and in my view does not exist unless in an afterlife.  For those who believe it exists, however, you probably agree that she will at an instance turn you into a distant memory the moment a wealthier father of five walks her way.

Lucre. Shekels. Thirty pieces of silver for her mortal soul! A lady that will throw away true love in exchange for nothing more than mere money is a filthy stinking God-damned whore who will just bid her time before she slips a knife through your throat the moment you show signs of some significant wealth

Despise my counsel for now but when it is time for angel advice, call me for help with your first pitch. If you must spend with these attention seekers, take advantage of the most wild and sex-fueled relationship of your life but be true to yourself and others by diving into romance fully conscious that it cannot possibly end well like in the movies.

It is alright if our first instincts fail us but don’t cling to a sinking buoy. We are trolled all the time, skepticism should be our default mode. And in that mode, sometimes they fool us by our own credulity, while at times we fool ourselves through hyper vigilance. It happens to the best of us. What then is the way out? I’m starting to see little, if any point, in sleeping with a woman I couldn’t see myself committing to. And since I swore not to commit, stay off women entirely.

After seeing her nakedness quite frequently as to satisfy your appetite at least temporarily, only then will you begin to wonder whether there is a clinical diagnosis for the tendencies that she is exhibiting. If you have a trace of psychology in your head, it won’t be hard to realize that she suffers a serious narcissistic personality disorder, meeting all the five criteria as described in the Diagnostic and Statistical Manual for Mental Disorders (5^th edition).

It may not necessarily imply that you are less attractive or not-so-well-groomed but there are awkward moments when men will give her too much attention and the moment they look at you, the question they will be asking is why the hell she settled for a loser like you! You may carry all the pride like I do and boast of the strongest sense of self-esteem but this will not shield you from the unsightly scenes in shopping malls, clubs and restaurants.

Before the approach-less Troll and weak of thought interrupt my prose by insinuating that men’s sexual value is judged by the same looks metric as women’s sexual value, let it be pounded into their scrawny  cognitive patterns that a man’s relationship worthiness is judged by many measures, not least of which is his social value and seductive ability. When I talk of men shooting out of their league, therefore, don’t just picture an ugly man flirting with a naturally-born and socially acceptable blonde (though it could mean so). It could also mean a man who compares favorably well in the looks department but is socially awkward or rather cannot clearly bring out the difference between ‘their and there’.

Beautiful ladies are born with this insatiable need for unwarranted compliments. Whatever she wears and no matter how she wears it, a high-end lady expects a compliment. Whether you mean it or not (perhaps another reason why I’m not dating any time soon since I tend to notice good cars at the expense of pretty ladies no matter how they spin their butts), you will be required to make compliments a refrain. Deny her the compliment for a second and another man will gladly offer it with the hope that it will lead him to her pants, only to find that the color of the waters does not justify the quality of the pool.

With pretty ladies, you have to appeal to their vulnerabilities. At the very least, find something that impresses her. She will, all her life, be approached by men who have more cash, better cars, higher academic qualifications, better dress codes, a more enhanced vibe and perhaps a bigger c*ck. Unless you figure out what impresses her and provide exactly that, she will only pass time by your bed-side waiting for the right person. If you are blessed with a wry, playful and artistic prose that is delightful to read, use it to impress her through texts.  If you are forced to laugh at dry humor just to ensure that she notices it, just contend with the swanky task of dating a pretty lady.

Lastly, trust is the biggest nightmare you will have to sleep with each night. She will be approached by men of all classes and vibes since they probably have the same eye as you do. Most of these will flirt in your presence and there are high chances that she flirts back since most of these ladies tend to be smart physically and nothing more.

Be prepared for a probable of diagnosis with lifestyle illnesses such as high blood pressure and diabetes. If you can’t opt for the condom, I need not spell your doom since most of the big men she sleeps with will only pay for a peeled mango. They never know the taste of an orange together with its skin! I deliberately excluded a heart attack considering your social class. With the routine managu and Githeri, I cannot contemplate the source of bad cholesterol to throw any of the cardiovascular illnesses your way.

International phone calls interspersed with weekend-long vacations in hotel rooms across the coveted coastal region will not be so rare as long as you still call her your chic. But in the end, losing the pathway to a high-grade pussy is a blow to a man’s pleasure center, one that will leave you miserable irrespective of the memories. She risks discovery and the concomitant loss of her feminine prestige and treats from her financial suitors. Because her nature does not allow for shared love between disparate men who offer the kind of love that would not equal to the wildest dreams of the average representative of her sex, all you will be left to enjoy are a few fleeting memories built over the short time.

At the end of the day, however, you have the advantage of an outstanding pussy, not necessarily in terms of quality but rather getting for free what other men have to pay heavily for.  Trading up, as you gain social value and get older, you will be treated to hotter and younger chicks who start to be more accessible as you’re more mature, sly, charming and laden with shiny assets.

When it comes to marriage, you then discover that these same young hotties are dating grandfathers. If it can’t trickle down to the less attractive lady, then you shell the entire marriage ambition and finally join my therapy class.